Now I made this switch for lots of reasons, in case you haven’t read Why I Quit Pants please go ahead and do so. If you aren’t making this switch for spiritual reasons or health reasons, maybe you just want to be more feminine. Maybe you’re just gathering information before you make a decision. Whatever your reasons may be, I hope this article helps!
When I made the switch from a wardrobe full of pants with one skirt -I never wore it, btw.- to no pants (except workout pants) and skirts/dresses, I felt nervous. I was nervous someone would realize that I’d stopped wearing pants. I dare say I was terrified someone would ask about it. I felt like I was doing something wrong. Like I was holding my breathe hoping no one knew I was committing a crime! I didn’t really realize how badly I wanted to fit in with society until then. Go with the proverbial flow.
I could feel judgement was coming and I knew it would be very unpleasant. Why? Because I was going against the current of society with this choice. You might think it’s not a big deal if you haven’t experienced this, seeing it from the outside it may just look like a weird choice. But, for me it felt so scary. I’d like to give you an idea of what I went through when I made this change in my life and share with you an outline of what you can probably expect if you make this change, too.
What to Expect
-Judgement and whispers might come, good news: it isn’t that bad.
Be prepared to hear things like, “You’re NEVER going to wear pants again? :o”, “Stop it.”, “You’re wrong, that is not what the bible says!”, “Please, stop.”, “Oh my mom use to think that too. Maybe you should talk to her.”, “Women have ALWAYS worn pants, do your research!”. Some people can get hostile about this topic. After minimal to moderate amounts of brooding and a few people talking about you behind your back it ought to blow over. Hopefully, your circle of people will be more supportive than expected! ❤ If they’re not, be firm but remember to be nice. It can be scary for other people, too. (My brothers were very shocked seeing my clothing go all girly out of no-where. They say it would’ve been nice if I had eased into it more than I did lol).
-Sometimes you might not feel like yourself anymore.
This is something that quite a few people have mentioned as a result of them switching. You’re going against the current now (which is sadly typical when you follow the advice of the bible!). You will need to remember that you are You, no matter what you wear. Expressing that you’re a woman through your choice in clothing is part of a higher calling. You’re expressing gratefulness for how you were created and embracing it, not simply dealing with it. It’s a gift, so try not to let this bout get you too down. Take some time to breathe, think happy thoughts and look up accessories to go with a great outfit or unique dresses on Pinterest!
–Women might not like you.. for a while.
Now this is something one blog pointed out (I’ll leave it in the resources) that women will give you the most grief about making this change. I’ve found that to be true (not all women though).
–Men will like you more!
I’ve ALSO found that men are nicer, more chivalrous (opening doors & more respectful), overall more responsive to my presence. 🙂 Even Daniel. He says it gave him a new respect for me when I made this decision, not only was I showing courtesy to him as my future husband (keeping other peoples eyes off my rump/thighs) I had begun to make it easier for him to NOT look at my butt. And before marriage, for us at least, that’s a big deal.
-Your hips might get more round (a good round).
I noticed this within a few days of no pants and Daniel has noticed this, too. In the last two to three months my hips have become more rounded. I think my body is adjusting to having more ‘breathing room’ so to speak. And where I use to be relatively flatter, I’ve gotten relatively rounder!
-Sometimes you might struggle to pull together an outfit
This has been the case for me after I learned about the standards you need to implement when choosing to dress modestly I ended up having to donate a lot of my new clothes.. like BRAND new clothes. Not even two months old. Not to worry, though, I have the list here for you to read so you can avoid buying any nice new clothes until you read it!
Biblical Modesty Standards
Those standards are as follows: Your skirt/dress needs to be BELOW knee-length so that when you sit down fabric falls down far enough that your underwear or meaty cheeks doesn’t show from between your knees.
It needs to be thick enough that it isn’t sheer and so you cannot see the outline of underwear. That would be low-class, honeys. Definitely not modest if you can see your undies. The neckline needs to be no more than two fingers width (not length) below the collar bone and ALWAYS above the line of your armpit. Sleeves or wide straps are necessary.
After all of that it’s been tough to make due with clothes I own. Thankfully, no one really minds me wearing the same skirt/shirt pieces over-and-over until I’m able to afford a new piece for a new outfit combination ;).
Making the Switch
I quit pants semi-cold turkey. I ‘window-shopped’ online for a few weeks while I saved my money. Then I jumped in, ordered $121.90 worth of dresses off of Rosewholesale.com which is based in Singapore. I say semi-cold turkey because the dresses I ordered were different from the pictures (just slightly) and not all of them were the lengths I expected. Some looked more like shirts than dresses. I would’ve liked to quit [pants] as soon as they arrived. I ended up with not as many outfits as I expected, so it had to wait a little more. (I do recommend that site.. but check the measurements and read the reviews!)
As a result of my poor ordering skills for a few months I didn’t have the new wardrobe I expected. But, I did have an excuse to wear pants 1 – 3 days a week still.
After a few weeks I weaned down to just wearing leggings under my short dresses, that lasted for about 1 month.. Maybe 1 1/2 months. And I became MORE convicted. So I only wore pajama pants to bed for a little while and only dresses/skirts during the day. I knew this was my crutch (pajama pants) and it was holding me back from what I knew needed to be done.. so I went straight to Victoriassecret.com looking for nightgowns. I picked out an adorable one (you can see a similar one here). Now, It might seem odd that I checked Victoria’s Secret for a modest nightgown – BUT I’ve purchased a pajama shirt from there before and it was the most amazingly soft thing I’ve ever owned! So naturally I went there first. This was before I knew that my clothes needed to be BELOW the knee, so I was mostly just looking for comfort and NOT pants.
A few days went by and what do you know VS was having a sale! I went with my mom, both of my sisters and Tori (my sister-in-law) and I bought the nightgown/T-shirt! It does have a slit on the side which I figured would be fine since it’s just for bed. My dad goes through the whole house most nights, giving out goodnight hugs and telling everyone he loves them.. so he saw my night-shirt and he didn’t like it (If you don’t live with your family you probably won’t have to worry about that 😉 ). My dad says I can wear it as long as I have leggings or shorts under it, for me though, that defeats the purpose. I’ve put it away and will be saving it until Daniel+I get married. For now I’ve found it easier to wear maxi skirts to bed cause no one could possibly argue that they’re covering enough. I’m still in the market for a good night gown if you know of any!
I don’t remember exactly what happened that caused me to COMPLETELY switch. I think the saying “See no evil, eat no evil” was echoing in my head from a health-food video I watched and I guess it just clicked that if I wanted to stop wearing pants/shorts completely I would have to remove their tempting-familiarity from my eyes .. and drawers. I gave them all away except my pajama pants (which I later gave to my younger sister). Now I only own three pairs of jogging pants which I use for working out at home. I work out in private.
Anyhow, here is what I recommend to help make the whole process easier for you!
-Do your research
Really take your time to think about what kind of style you’d like to have. If I had done this more beforehand I think I would’ve had an easier time switching completely. Check lots of websites, stores, read articles, everything!
-Shop in person and Try Everything On
*BEWARE OF PURCHASING THINGS ONLINE until you know what you want..
Same thing here, if I had shopped in person the first time around I probably would’ve ended up happier. That’s fine though, I had things to learn :). Shop around, and if you don’t have the funds for a whole new wardrobe that’s fine. Shop around anyways! Find out what you want, what feels comfortable and looks good on you. Try multiple cuts and styles of skirts. Make a list or take pictures with your phone so you don’t forget about them.
-Save up (optional)
If you need to save up then do so. Save however much you need to buy all of your lovely new items on your list (or picture slides 😉 ) and think them over as you save, be sure to look at them frequently to see if you still want them. Your mind could change as you consider it with fresh eyes. That’s fine, just keep tuning in your dressdar (dress radar?) and figure out what works best for you!
-Recommended Staple Pieces
Get a few skirts, things that go well with some plain blouses or tops.
Get Maxi Skirts
Get tank tops that are scoop necks (not V-necks) to go under your blouses or tops if they are too low or sheer so you don’t have to toss everything!
Get a few plain blouses or tops that will go well with uber-feminine outfits or even simpler outfits.
Get a night gown – one that you’d be fine with other people seeing (the same way you’d be fine with people seeing your old pants-jammies).
Get/Use Camisoles or Slips these are a bit tough to find, they will usually be in the lingerie sections online or in stores.
Now, I know that everyone’s style is going to be different. Some ladies are probably going to not want to wear jean skirts, some are not going to want maxi skirts, etc. Everyone has to customize their new wardrobe. I hope you find this all to be helpful and I’d love to hear from you! How did you make the switch? Know any good modest workout skirts?
Please comment, like, follow and share 😀
https://www.pinterest.com/kendra1250/outfits/ (Please follow me on Pinterest! :D)
Dressing With Dignity by Colleen Hammond
Growing up Duggar: It’s All About Relationships by Jill, Jinger, Jessa and Jana Duggar